heart check

Recently I have begun asking myself what I'm going to do when Lent is over. Since I've given up Facebook for Lent, how will I manage going back to it----what parameters will I need to put in place? How can I avoid the slow, insidious "FB creep" in my daily life (the urge to log on to troll for fresh statuses or the latest viral video, even when I've been on only a heartbeat earlier)? As I pondered this aloud with my worship team the other night, one member said, "Isn't the point of giving up something for Lent, to make you think more about Christ's sacrifice?" The comment stopped me dead in my tracks. I had originally given up FB with that in mind, but somehow it had turned into a self-help project of sorts. I mean, it was never along the lines of "Oh, I'm going to give up candy because I need to lose weight anyway", but somehow my sacrifice had degenerated into my aiming for becoming a more disciplined, productive person, rather than seeking to be more mindful of God. My heart drives me crazy, because this kind of thing happens ALL THE TIME. :p I love the Lord, so I choose to serve Him, and then, ever so gradually, serving takes precedence over connecting with Him. Without meaning to, I start loving service or sacrifice for God, over loving Him, first and foremost. I guess it's why the first commandment is first----"I am the Lord your God...you shall have no other gods before me." God knows how easily messed up our hearts can become. It seems like mine is just hell-bent on making anything a god---including serving God, or sacrificing for God. And then there are the innocuous things like Facebook, working out, or even relationships that can vie for preeminence in my heart I went to see a cardiologist a week or two ago, as I'm supposed to do, for a periodic check-up. And spiritually, that's what I must do, time and time again. I must get my heart checked, very regularly, by the Spirit who shows me again and again (and yet again) where I've gotten off track and then gently leads me back to where I'm meant to be.